1. Andy Borowitz: Americans Fear That Former Trump Staffers Will Be Released Into Their Cities

Americans are in a state of abject panic amid reports that Donald J. Trump is threatening to dump thousands of fired Cabinet members and aides on cities that do not support him.

Harland Dorrinson, who lives in San Francisco, said that “every American should be alarmed” at the spectre of former Trump staffers like Kirstjen Nielsen, Scott Pruitt, and Anthony Scaramucci descending on their towns.

“A lot of these people were unsavory to begin with, and their time at the White House only hardened them,” he said.

Carol Foyler, who resides in Boston, said that, with Trump staffers being fired at a rate of four hundred a day, she lives in terror at the prospect of these castoffs melting into the general population.

“I was on line at Starbucks the other day and I thought I saw Steve Bannon,” she said. “It turned out it was just some other creepy-looking guy, but my heart was racing. The fear is real.”

Tracy Klugian, who lives in Minneapolis, has started a petition to create a city ordinance preventing former Trump aides from settling in his town. “This city is full,” he said.

As they brace themselves for an onslaught of fired Trump underlings, some Americans are grasping for a silver lining. “As of now, Stephen Miller and Sarah Huckabee Sanders are still employed at the White House, where their movements can be closely monitored,” Foyler said. “But, it if that changes, God help us all.” https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/

2. White House officials concerned about being exposed by Mueller report

Some of the more than one dozen current and former White House officials who cooperated with special counsel Robert Mueller are worried that the version of his report expected to be made public on Thursday will expose them as the source of damaging information about President Donald Trump, according to multiple witnesses in the investigation.

Some of the officials and their lawyers have sought clarity from the Justice Department on whether the names of those who cooperated with Mueller’s team will be redacted or if the public report will be written in a way that makes it obvious who shared certain details of Trump’s actions that were part of the obstruction of justice probe, people familiar with the discussions said. But, they said, the Justice Department has refused to elaborate.

Of particular concern is how Trump — and his allies — will react if it appears to be clear precisely who shared information with Mueller, these people said.

“They got asked questions and told the truth, and now they’re worried the wrath will follow,” one former White House official said. https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/white-house/white-house-officials-concerned-about-being-exposed-mueller-report-n994861

3. Immigration brings out Trump's most radical self

Nothing stirs President Trump’s most radical ideas like immigration. And nothing so stirs his willingness to entertain what some consider illegal or wrong.

Trump is genuinely frustrated that two years into his presidency, he hasn’t built the wall he promised, and he hasn’t reduced the flow of asylum seekers and undocumented immigrants into the U.S. In fact, the numbers are going up. The issue is highlighted above all others by the news outlet he focuses on most, Fox News. That raises his blood pressure every day.

He can’t understand why he’s not allowed to have total control over who enters the U.S. across the southern border. https://www.axios.com/trump-immigration-radical-migrants-border-sanctuary-cities-1d38fa97-29d3-43b8-9e18-522e538d1d8a.html

4. The DAILY GRILL

“Frankly, Chris, I don’t think Congress — particularly not this group of congressmen and women — are smart enough to look through the thousands of pages that I would assume that President Trump’s taxes will be. “My guess is most of them don’t do their own taxes, and I certainly don’t trust them to look through the decades of success that the president has and determine anything.” — WH press secretary Sarah Sanders pushing back against Democrats’ demands for information on the Trump’s finances.

VERSUS

It remains unclear if Trump even understands the essentials of the business he runs. That would actually make sense given the frequency with which he has had to declare bankruptcy in the relatively foolproof business of running casinos, even beginning with hundreds of millions of dollars in his father’s money. He has only survived by sheer shamelessness: using loopholes and outright fraud to stiff his contractors and cheat his lenders, then using his outsized ego to sell his own image on sub-par reality television shows, steaks, fraudulent universities, and other products. His golf courses tend to struggle, and there’s definitely something weird going on at least with the financing of his course in Turnberry. -- David Atkins in the Washington Monthly.

 

“I know nothing about WikiLeaks. It’s not my thing.” — Trump seeking to distance himself from WikiLeaks after founder Julian Assange’s arrest in London.

VERSUS

Trump Says WikiLeaks 141 Times On The Campaign Trail.

 

Great news! #MAGA — Donald J. Trump@realDonaldTrump showing a Fox graphic that mistakingly shows Trump’s approval at 55%, referencing a Georgetown Politics poll.

VERSUS

I’m the Director of @GUPolitics & this graphic is incorrect.
The Battleground Poll shows 58% approval on the economy.
But it shows only 43% overall approval, & 52% disapproval.
The 55% number is the President’s unfavorable rating. (Only 40% favorable.) http://politics.georgetown.edu/full-questionnaire/ … — MoElleithee@MoElleithee

 

“[Barr] plans to redact four categories of information: grand jury material, information that could reveal intelligence sources and methods, details that could compromise ongoing investigations, and information impacting ‘peripheral’ third parties.” — The Hill

VERSUS

Green: Grand jury testimony.
Red: Reveals intelligence sources and methods.
Blue: Compromises ongoing investigation.
Orange: Impacts peripheral third party.
Teal: Blue marker ran out.
Salmon: Reveals unflattering detail about the experience of staying at a Trump property or resort.
Crossed Out In Gold: President Trump was trying to highlight because he thought it exculpatory but pen was too big.
Whited Out: Not redacted, just a typo.
Crossed Out in a Zodiac Symbol With Many Tiny Pen Strokes: Person redacting watched cursed videotape.
Each Letter Filled Meticulously by a Variety of Colors to Form a Picture of Saint Patrick Blessing What Looks Like a Diseased Hippopotamus: Guy who was redacting went on break, monk took over.
Covered in Layers of Aluminum Foil: Redactor suddenly became aware this went all the way to the top.
Crossed Out in Pencil With Question Mark Written on Side: Redactor wasn’t sure of information’s importance, reminder to go back and ask someone, oops!
Yellow: This isn’t redacting! This is highlighting!
Purple: Information compromises Byzantine emperor.
Pale Green: Information reminded redactor of spring.
Turquoise: Information reminded redactor of last time he felt truly still.
Half-Inch Streak of Gorgeous Lavender: Lovely word the redactor wanted to keep to himself.
Brown Splotch: Redactor was eating gravy and spilled some on report. — Alexandra Petri in the Washington Post

5. From MEDIA MATTERS (They watch Fox News so you don't have to)

Hannity guest Glenn Beck claims migrant caravans are “an assault” on America funded by George Soros. Beck: "They just throw wave after wave after wave of people until you just can't fight it anymore.” https://www.mediamatters.org/video/2019/04/10/hannity-guest-glenn-beck-claims-migrant-caravans-are-assault-america-funded-george-soros/223411

Trump Fed pick Herman Cain sent scammy sponsored emails promoting gold companies. https://www.mediamatters.org/blog/2019/04/11/trump-fed-pick-herman-cain-sent-scammy-sponsored-emails-promoting-gold-companies/223416

On Fox Business, Lou Dobbs joins Diamond & Silk in claiming Rep. Ilhan Omar puts "ideology" over America. Diamond: "I don't think she represents America. I don't know who she represent, but it's not America.” https://www.mediamatters.org/video/2019/04/11/fox-business-lou-dobbs-joins-diamond-silk-claiming-rep-ilhan-omar-puts-ideology-over-amerca/223425

Fox's Brian Kilmeade falsely claims Republicans want to fix Obamacare. The Trump administration supports overturning Obamacare and Republican lawmakers have repeatedly voted to repeal it. https://www.mediamatters.org/video/2019/04/12/foxs-brian-kilmeade-falsely-claims-republicans-want-fix-obamacare/223429

Fox's Neil Cavuto dismisses the illegality of plan to send migrants to sanctuary cities because Trump is "at wits end.” Cavuto: "I'm not endorsing his idea and it is illegal, but he's really at wits end.” https://www.mediamatters.org/video/2019/04/12/foxs-neil-cavuto-dismisses-illegality-plan-send-migrants-sanctuary-cities-because-trump-wits-end/223436

Right-wing evangelicals are using Pete Buttigieg to attack progressive Christians. Extreme anti-LGBTQ groups and media are even calling for Buttigieg to stop being gay and undergo conversion therapy. https://www.mediamatters.org/blog/2019/04/12/right-wing-evangelicals-are-using-pete-buttigieg-attack-progressive-christians/223434

Six weeks of Fox's Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez obsession: "Totalitarian," "ignorant," "scary," and waging a "war on cows.” In these 42 days, Fox News and Fox Business talked about AOC every single day, mentioning her at least 3,181 times. https://www.mediamatters.org/blog/2019/04/12/Six-weeks-of-Foxs-Alexandria-Ocasio-Cortez-obsession-Totalitarian-ignorant-scary-and-wagin/223386

Fox News anchors allow CPAC Chair Matt Schlapp to again push the baseless right-wing lie of voter fraud. Despite Schlapp’s hysteria, California issuing driver’s licenses to undocumented immigrants will not cause widespread voter fraud. https://www.mediamatters.org/video/2019/04/15/Fox-News-anchors-allow-CPAC-Chair-Matt-Schlapp-to-again-push-the-baseless-right-wing-lie-o/223444

Fox anchor Bill Hemmer misinformed viewers about Bernie Sanders’ tax proposals. On April 15, Sanders had a town hall on Fox News, where hosts Bret Baier and Martha MacCallum questioned him about his tax proposals. The following morning, Hemmer falsely stated that Sanders claimed that “everyone should pay 52%.” In reality, Sanders' plan proposes a 52% top marginal tax rate only for people whose annual income is greater than $10 million. https://www.mediamatters.org/video/2019/04/16/fox-anchor-bill-hemmer-misinformed-viewers-about-bernie-sanders-tax-proposals/223460

On Fox "straight news," guest Art Laffer says Bernie Sanders being elected president would cause a total market collapse. Laffer also falsely blames the Great Recession on Barack Obama. https://www.mediamatters.org/video/2019/04/15/fox-straight-news-guest-art-laffer-says-bernie-sanders-being-elected-president-would-cause-total/223452

Fox guest: Working people in Europe "don't dress very well, they don't go to restaurants" because of "that welfare state.” https://www.mediamatters.org/video/2019/04/16/fox-guest-working-people-europe-dont-dress-very-well-they-dont-go-restaurants-because-welfare-state/223458

Study: As Notre Dame burned, anti-Muslim content surged online as the tragic news broke on Monday of a fire engulfing Notre Dame Cathedral in Paris, with far-right figures weaponizing news of the seemingly accidental fire to link it to the 9/11 terrorist attacks and to scapegoat Muslims and Islam. A Media Matters analysis found that anti-Muslim sentiment spiked on 4chan and 8chan on April 15, while the story containing the words “Muslim” or “Islam” that got the most engagements on Facebook was from an anti-Muslim bigot and claimed, “Jihadis reveled in the fire engulfing the Notre Dame Cathedral.” https://www.mediamatters.org/blog/2019/04/16/study-notre-dame-burned-anti-muslim-content-thrived-online/223467

Tucker Carlson: Protecting abortion access isn't about “autonomy,” it’s “about making sure that women can be obedient workers.” Carlson: The Democratic Party "loves" abortion, and "wants more of it, up until birth, maybe a little bit after, if possible.” https://www.mediamatters.org/video/2019/04/17/tucker-carlson-protecting-abortion-access-isnt-about-autonomy-it-s-about-making-sure-women-can-be/223488

Rush Limbaugh is already attacking the redacted Mueller report: "No matter what it says, we're going to be lied to.” Limbaugh: "Everybody on Mueller's team was a pro-Hillary, Trump-hating lawyer.” https://www.mediamatters.org/video/2019/04/17/Rush-Limbaugh-is-already-attacking-the-redacted-Mueller-report-No-matter-what-it-says-were/223485

6. Trump bulldozes across the presidency’s red lines

President Donald Trump has spent the last few weeks trying to bend to his will what are arguably three of the federal government’s least political institutions – the Department of Homeland Security, Federal Reserve and Department of Justice.

Frustrated by the organizations’ deliberate pace and the substance of their decision-making, Trump has tried to remake them in his own image. He’s purging staffers who disagreed with him, or whom he felt were insufficiently loyal at DHS, and he hopes to stock the Fed with vocal political allies who can do his bidding on monetary policy.

Trump cares little about how such moves will be perceived, former administration officials and Republicans close to the White House say. They argue he always prefers to push the boundaries of what is possible, legally and otherwise. And in year three of his presidency, he’s pushing harder than ever before. https://www.politico.com/story/2019/04/12/trump-presidency-analysis-1271841

7. Has the Senate finally hit rock bottom?

Last fall’s brutal confirmation fight over Brett Kavanaugh’s Supreme Court confirmation led to such bad blood that even old friends weren’t talking.

Then came an ugly, 35-day government shutdown, the longest in U.S. history.

Just last week, Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.) triggered the “nuclear option” and weakened the Senate’s vaunted filibuster to steamroll over Democratic resistance to President Donald Trump’s nominees — the third time in six years the majority party has unilaterally changed Senate rules.

To top it all off, the Senate has now failed to muster enough votes to pass a simple disaster-aid bill, something that was once routine and is a failure that will affect millions of Americans.
https://www.politico.com/story/2019/04/11/senate-nuclear-option-filibuster-1271791

8. An ICE Official Who Said Detention Was "More Like Summer Camp" Will Now Lead The Agency

The Trump administration has tapped Matthew Albence to lead Immigration and Customs Enforcement in the wake of the sudden resignation of its former leader.

Albence became better known after his appearance on Capitol Hill on July 31 during which he said that family detention centers were best described as ‘more like a summer camp,’ to the shock of some advocates and politicians. https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/hamedaleaziz/ice-director-matthew-albence-trump-immigration-enforcement

9. A Federal Judge Compared Trump's Criticism Of The Courts To The KKK And Segregationists

In a highly unusual public rebuke against President Donald Trump by a sitting member of the federal judiciary, US District Judge Carlton Reeves delivered a speech Thursday calling the Trump administration a "great assault on our judiciary" and comparing the president's criticism of the judiciary to tactics used by the Ku Klux Klan and segregationists.

According to a copy of the speech obtained by BuzzFeed News, Reeves, who is black and sits in Jackson, Mississippi, extensively quoted Trump's tweets and public comments about judges and the courts (the written version includes footnotes making clear who and what Reeves is referring to) and blasted the lack of diversity among Trump's judicial nominees.

"When politicians attack courts as 'dangerous,' 'political,' and guilty of 'egregious overreach,' you can hear the Klan’s lawyers, assailing officers of the court across the South. When leaders chastise people for merely 'us[ing] the courts,' you can hear the Citizens Council, hammering up the names of black petitioners in Yazoo City, [Mississippi]," Reeves said, quoting Trump. "When the powerful accuse courts of 'open[ing] up our country to potential terrorists,' you can hear the Southern Manifesto’s authors, smearing the judiciary for simply upholding the rights of black folk. When lawmakers say 'we should get rid of judges,' you can hear segregationist senators, writing bills to strip courts of their power.” https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/zoetillman/federal-judge-carlton-reeves-trump-kkk-segregationists

10. Inside the Russian effort to target Sanders supporters — and help elect Trump

Russia’s effort to promote Sanders as a way to influence the U.S. election began shortly after he declared his candidacy in the spring of 2015, according to Mueller’s indictment of the 13 Russians. The aim was to defeat or weaken Clinton, who had angered Russian President Vladimir Putin when she was secretary of state. 
One reason that Sanders was on Russia’s radar has been little noted: He, like Trump, opposed trade deals such as the Trans-Pac­ific Partnership. Putin had been critical of the TPP, saying it was secretive and “hardly facilitates sustainable development of Asia Pacific.”

During the primary race, Sanders gave at least three interviews to a Russia-controlled television network, RT, in which his trade stance was highlighted. The network in February 2016 criticized MSNBC for breaking away from a Sanders speech after he said he was “helping to lead the opposition to the Trans-Pacific Partnership.” RT posted an article headlined “Bernie Sanders ‘censored’ by MSNBC while criticizing trade deal.” 

Around the time that Sanders was featured on RT, Russian employees at the Internet Research Agency were given a document explaining how to influence the U.S. election. The workers were told to “use any opportunity to criticize Hillary and the rest (except Sanders and Trump — we support them),” according to Mueller’s indictment of the Russians. 

The Twitter database shows the impact. The tweets sent from Russia, cloaked to look as though they came from Americans, included: “Bernie Sanders looks to black voters to boost his underdog campaign”; “Hillary Clinton’s summer of drama creates openings for Bernie Sanders and Joe Biden”; and “I’m for Bernie all the way!”  https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/inside-the-russian-effort-to-target-sanders-supporters--and-help-elect-trump/2019/04/11/741d7308-5576-11e9-8ef3-fbd41a2ce4d5_story.html

11. From the Late Shows

Number of Times Alec Baldwin Absolutely Nailed Trump: https://youtu.be/VVWaQatf4kQ

Tucker Carlson Cold Open - SNL: https://youtu.be/Sld27PfAF3M

The View: Jenny McCarthy on Vaccines - SNL: https://youtu.be/Wfl-uMVbNn8

Jail Cell Cold Open - SNL: https://youtu.be/dvLfK0iOyD4

SNL's Weekend Update: Apologizes After 20 Years "CANADA" April 13, 2019 “SNL’s": https://youtu.be/kLh8bNMBkdM

Jimmy Kimmel Live: Trump Thinks We're Very Lucky He's President: https://youtu.be/AlMf7KSLKgA

Trump Dodges Questions on Mueller, Tax Returns, WikiLeaks: A Closer Look: https://youtu.be/AcrYY-5PdgE

Late Night with Seth Meyers: Sarah Sanders Says Congress Is Not "Smart Enough" for Trump's Tax Returns: A Closer Look; https://youtu.be/39XmffMuds0

The Late Show with Stephen Colbert: Maxine Waters Has The Gavel (Not 'Gravel')
https://youtu.be/3cisO5Tx2gI

12. Elizabeth Warren Proposes Broad Plan to Protect Public Lands

Ms. Warren’s plan, which she outlined in a post on Medium ahead of trips to Colorado and Utah this week, promises an executive order that would prohibit new leases for fossil fuel drilling offshore and on public lands, calls for the creation of “a 21st century Civilian Conservation Corps” staffed by 10,000 young people and seeks to reduce inaccessible public acreage by 50 percent. https://www.nytimes.com/2019/04/15/us/politics/elizabeth-warren-public-lands.html

13. With Polls and Private Meetings, Republicans Craft Blunt Messaging to Paint Democrats as Extreme

Republican leaders are sharpening and poll-testing lines of attack that portray Democratic policies on health care, the environment and abortion as far outside the norm, in hopes of arming President Trump with hyperbolic sound bites — some of them false — asserting that Democrats would cause long waits for doctors or make killing babies after birth legal.

The blunt messaging underscores one of the biggest challenges facing Democrats as they try to defeat the incumbent president: the need to define themselves and their ideas before Mr. Trump and his conservative allies do it for them.

The Republican National Committee has already begun polling in 16 states to assess ways to discredit ideas like “Medicare for all,” which Senator Bernie Sanders proposed in a bill this week, and build on the party’s broader argument that Democratic candidates like Mr. Sanders are promoting an extreme socialist agenda. Social conservative leaders have met with White House officials to discuss calling attention to Democratic-sponsored legislation to loosen restrictions on abortion in the second and third trimesters, like one that passed recently in New York.

The recent focus on health care and abortion follows well-coordinated attacks on policies like the Green New Deal, which reduced the far-reaching climate change proposal to a punch line with jokes about cow flatulence and putting farms out of business. https://www.nytimes.com/2019/04/12/us/politics/democrats-republicans-2020.html

14. Twice as many companies paying zero taxes under Trump tax plan

Taxpayers are scrambling to make last-minute payments due to the Internal Revenue Service in just four days, but many of the country's largest publicly-held corporations are doing better: They've reported they owe absolutely nothing on the billions of dollars in profits they earned last year.

At least 60 companies reported that their 2018 federal tax rates amounted to effectively zero, or even less than zero, on income earned on U.S. operations, according to an analysis released today by the Washington, D.C.-based think tank, the Institute on Taxation and Economic Policy. The number is more than twice as many as ITEP found roughly, per year, on average in an earlier, multi-year analysis before the new tax law went into effect. https://www.nbcnews.com/business/taxes/twice-many-companies-paying-zero-taxes-under-trump-tax-plan-n993046

15. Roger Stone's woes: He's broke. Donald Trump doesn't call. And his wife broke her ankle.

Things are not going well for Roger Stone.

In a wide ranging interview with SiriusXM’s “Jim Norton & Sam Roberts” on Thursday he said his living situation has plummeted, his savings are gone and his car was impounded.

When money problems forced Stone and his wife to move from a Fort Lauderdale mansion to a one-room apartment the truck slipped out of gear and broke his wife’s ankle.

And he’s no longer talking to his old friend, President Donald Trump. https://www.sun-sentinel.com/news/politics/fl-ne-roger-stone-woes-20190411-story.html

16. Trump attorneys warn accounting firm not to hand over financial records

Donald Trump’s attorneys are warning of potential legal action if an accounting firm turns over a decade of the president’s financial records to the House Oversight and Reform Committee.

Trump attorneys William S. Consovoy and Stefan Passantino are urging Mazars USA not to comply with a subpoena that Oversight Chairman Elijah Cummings (D-Md.) issued on Monday for Trump’s financial documents, calling it a politically motivated scheme to take down the president. https://www.politico.com/story/2019/04/15/trump-financial-records-1275965