The Borowitz Report: Mike Johnson Claims Marjorie Taylor Greene Appears in Book of Revelation

Widening a rift among House Republicans, Speaker Mike Johnson told reporters on Sunday that Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene “makes a prominent appearance” in the Bible’s most apocalyptic book.

“I was in church this morning, just kind of flipping through the Bible,” Johnson said. “And as I was reading the Book of Revelation, all of a sudden I was like, ‘Holy cow, that’s Marge!’”

“I usually like to leave religion out of things, but since Marjorie is ushering in the End Times I felt I had to say something,” he said.

The Speaker was evasive when asked which character in the Book of Revelation mirrored the Georgia congresswoman, saying only, “She’s not the seven-headed dragon. To my knowledge Marge has only one head.”

He stressed that his decision to reveal Rep. Greene’s “pivotal role” in the end of the world had “absolutely nothing” to do with her motion to vacate the Speaker’s chair. “As long as I am Speaker, the chair is already vacant,” he said. https://www.borowitzreport.com/
 

GOP Lawmaker Blames ‘Diversity’ for Bridge Collapse

Utah lawmaker Phil Lyman (R), who is running for governor, quickly used Baltimore’s Francis Scott Key Bridge collapse to boost his gubernatorial campaign by blaming the accident on efforts to make workplaces more diverse.

Said Lyman: “This is what happens when you have Governors who prioritize diversity over the wellbeing [sic] and security of citizens.”

In a subsequent post, Lyman added, “DEI=DIE.” https://www.sltrib.com/news/politics/2024/03/26/baltimore-bridge-collapse-caused/

Biden aims to make North Carolina a top battleground

Republicans have a long history of success at the presidential level in North Carolina over the past 40 years, losing only once when Barack Obama carried the state in 2008. But Biden’s loss there in 2020 was the closest a Democrat has come since then, with Trump winning by just slightly more than 1 percentage point. Meanwhile, the state’s rapid growth has seen its largest Democratic-leaning counties become bigger and more blue.

That’s encouraged Democrats to be much more proactive in North Carolina this time around, particularly as it’s the only front-line swing state Biden did not carry in 2020. Already, his campaign has staffed up top positions and included the state in its $25 million battleground state ad buy. https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/2024-election/biden-north-carolina-top-battleground-trump-rcna143970

Trump compares himself to Jesus Christ – again

Donald Trump took to Truth Social to once again compare himself to Jesus Christ as he complained about the criminal and civil cases against him, which he views as politically motivated persecution.

On Monday, Mr Trump claimed that he received a message stating: “It’s ironic that Christ walked through His greatest persecution the very week they are trying to steal your property from you.”

“Beautiful, thank you!” Mr Trump responded, seemingly moved by the message that his $464m fine for decades of financial fraud is on the same level as the crucifixion and subsequent resurrection of Jesus Christ. The fine stems from a civil case in which New York State prosecuted Mr Trump for inflating the value of his assets to get better deals on loans and insurance.

The supposed sender of the message also included a verse saying, “They have also surrounded me with words of hatred – and fought against me without a cause – In return for my love they are my accusers ... let an accuser stand at his right hand – when he is judged – let him be found guilty – and let his prayer become sin – let his days be few – and let another take his office.” https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/us-politics/donald-trump-jesus-christ-compare-truth-social-b2518772.html

Democrat who made reproductive rights a campaign focus will win Alabama special election

Marilyn Lands, a Democrat who made reproductive rights a central part of her campaign, will win a special election Tuesday for an Alabama state House seat.

Her victory serves as another data point for national Democrats, who hope the backlash over strict state abortion laws following the overturning of Roe v. Wade and concerns about in vitro fertilization treatments will help their party in November, even in traditionally Republican areas. https://www.cnn.com/2024/03/26/politics/alabama-special-election-democrat-reproductive-rights/index.html

US Backs $50 Billion Ukraine Bond Using Frozen Russia Assets

The U.S. proposed to its Group of Seven allies that they create a special purpose vehicle to issue at least $50 billion of bonds backed by the profits generated by frozen Russian sovereign assets and use the proceeds to support Ukraine. https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2024-03-21/us-backs-50-billion-bond-for-ukraine-using-frozen-russia-assets

Lev Parnas, ex-Giuliani associate, testified allegations against Bidens are false and 'spread by the Kremlin'

In an interview with NBC News after his testimony, Parnas argued that the impeachment inquiry hearings are "pushing the same Russian narrative and propaganda.”

Ex-Rudy Giuliani associate Lev Parnas slammed former President Donald Trump and his associates for pushing what he said were false allegations against the Biden family during the House Oversight Committee's hearing Wednesday in the GOP impeachment inquiry into President Joe Biden.

Parnas, a Ukrainian American businessman who worked closely with former Trump attorney Giuliani in 2018 and 2019 to try to find damaging information about the president, appeared as a witness at the invitation of committee Democrats alongside Hunter Biden’s former business partners Tony Bobulinski and Jason Galanis.

“The American people have been lied to, by Donald Trump, Rudy Giuliani and various cohorts of individuals in government and media positions,” Parnas said in his opening statement. “They created falsehoods to serve their own interests knowing it would undermine the strength of our nation.” https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/joe-biden/lev-parnas-ex-giuliani-associate-testifies-allegations-bidens-are-fals-rcna144250

Biden Gains Ground Against Trump in Six Key States

President Joe Biden has gained ground against Republican Donald Trump in six of seven key swing states, and significantly so in at least two of them. The results make for the Democrat’s strongest position yet in a monthly Bloomberg News/Morning Consult poll.

The move in the president’s direction comes after five months of mostly consistent Trump leads, and follows a State of the Union address that rallied Democrats and seemed to mitigate concerns about Biden’s age.

The shift was significant in Wisconsin, where Biden leads Trump by one point after trailing him by four points in February, and in Pennsylvania, where the candidates are tied after Trump held a six-point lead last month. They are also tied in Michigan. https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2024-03-26/election-2024-poll-biden-gains-on-trump-in-six-swing-states

Tax the Rich Is Actually a Popular Bipartisan Stance, Poll Shows

The progressive rallying cry of “tax the rich” has morphed into a popular policy stance with voters in the key states that will decide the 2024 election, enjoying support even among those who prefer billionaire Donald Trump, according to the latest Bloomberg News/Morning Consult poll.

Fully 69% of registered voters in seven swing states say they favor higher taxes on billionaires, and they support higher income taxes on people who make more than $400,000 a year by the same margin, a potential boon to Democratic President Joe Biden’s economic agenda if he wins a second term. https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2024-03-26/swing-state-voters-favor-tax-the-rich-movement-election-poll?srnd=undefined&embedded-checkout=true

GOP group privately warns against all-in Biden attacks

The GOP’s top fundraising committee for state-level leaders is privately warning its candidates that just hitting President Biden will be ‘insufficient’ to win in November, arguing that Biden doesn’t hurt candidates down ballot in the way some presidents have in the past. https://www.axios.com/2024/03/25/republicans-attack-biden-2024-gop

Democrats Push for Hearing on Kushner Business Deals

Democrats are upping their focus on Jared Kushner, heavily scrutinizing former President Donald Trump’s son-in-law as Republicans have repeatedly spotlighted Hunter Biden and the business deals of the president’s family members. 

Maryland Rep. Jamie Raskin, the top Democrat on the Oversight Committee, and Rep. Robert Garcia (D-CA) sent a letter Tuesday asking leading Republicans on the committee to hold a hearing in light of new reporting on Kushner seeking overseas business deals as Trump looks to take back the White House. https://www.politico.com/live-updates/2024/03/26/congress/house-dems-target-kushner-00149029

Wife of Judge on Mifepristone Case Was Paid by Anti-Abortion Group

The fate of the abortion pill mifepristone is now before the Supreme Court, after a fifth-circuit appeals panel of three judges ruled against its distribution last summer. According to a new report, the wife of one of those judges—James Ho, a Trump appointee who previously served as the solicitor general of Texas—took at least six payments between 2018 and 2022 from the conservative legal group that brought the case to court. https://www.thedailybeast.com/wife-of-james-ho-judge-on-mifepristone-case-was-paid-by-anti-abortion-group

Trump’s invite to major donors prioritizes the committee paying his legal bills over the RNC

Donald Trump’s new joint fundraising agreement with the Republican National Committee directs donations to his campaign and a political action committee that pays the former president’s legal bills before the RNC gets a cut, according to a fundraising invitation obtained by The Associated Press.

The unorthodox diversion of funds to the Save America PAC makes it more likely that Republican donors could see their money go to Trump’s lawyers, who have received at least $76 million over the last two years to defend him against four felony indictments and multiple civil cases. Some Republicans are already troubled that Trump’s takeover of the RNC could shortchange the cash-strapped party. https://apnews.com/article/trump-campaign-fundraising-rnc-c0e8f1e7b59f70c5237e13a3462e5790
 

Judge dismisses ‘vapid’ Elon Musk lawsuit against group that cataloged racist content on X

A judge in California on Monday dismissed the tech billionaire Elon Musk’s lawsuit against the Center for Countering Digital Hate, a non-profit that has published reports chronicling the rise of racist, antisemitic and extremist content on X, formerly Twitter, since Musk’s acquisition.

The case was dismissed in accordance with the state’s anti-Slapp law, which forbids nuisance lawsuits intended to punish the exercise of free speech.

“Sometimes it is unclear what is driving a litigation, and only by reading between the lines of a complaint can one attempt to surmise a plaintiff’s true purpose,” wrote Charles Breyer, the US district judge, in the ruling. “Other times, a complaint is so unabashedly and vociferously about one thing that there can be no mistaking that purpose. This case represents the latter circumstance. This case is about punishing the defendants for their speech.” https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2024/mar/25/elon-musk-hate-speech-lawsuit

Trump Urges Israel to ‘Finish Up Your War'

Trump, in an interview with a conservative Israeli news outlet that was published on Monday, exhorted Israel “to finish up your war,” mixing bellicose support for the government of Israel with harsh warnings that the Jewish state was losing international support by providing “a very bad picture for the world.”

But while Mr. Trump had typically harsh words for President Biden — he called Mr. Biden “dumb” — he offered no prescriptions for what the United States should do, or for what he would do, if elected, to bring the war in Gaza to an end or to advance the cause of peace between Israel and the Palestinians. https://www.nytimes.com/2024/03/25/us/politics/trump-israel-hamas-war.html

Trump calls on Republicans to challenge DeSantis’ lone Florida supporter in Congress

Donald Trump wants a Republican to mount a primary challenge to Rep. Laurel Lee, the lone member of Florida’s congressional delegation to endorse Gov. Ron DeSantis in his unsuccessful bid for president. https://www.politico.com/news/2024/03/25/laurel-lee-trump-primary-desantis-00148789

Leonard Leo, Koch networks pour millions into groups prepping for potential second Trump administration

Huge funding from influential conservative donor networks is flowing into groups affiliated with a conservative venture aimed at creating a Republican ‘government-in-waiting,’ including over $55 million from groups linked to conservative activist Leonard Leo and the Koch network.

Launched by the Heritage Foundation in April 2022, Project 2025 is a two-pronged initiative to develop staunch conservative policy recommendations and grow a roster of thousands of right-wing personnel ready to fill the next Republican administration. With former President Donald Trump now the GOP’s presumptive 2024 nominee, the effort is essentially laying the groundwork for a potential Trump transition if he wins the election in November. https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/2024-election/leonard-leo-koch-networks-pour-millions-prep-potential-second-trump-ad-rcna144360

Biden Cancels $6 Billion in Student Debt in New Round of Relief

President Joe Biden is forgiving nearly $6 billion in federal student debt for almost 78,000 Americans working in public service, the latest effort to deliver on one of his signature initiatives ahead of November’s general election. https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2024-03-21/student-loan-forgiveness-biden-cancels-6-billion-in-latest-round

Trump leadership PAC racks up millions in legal bills

Donald Trump’s leadership PAC spent another $5.6 million on legal expenses in February, furthering a trend that has seen the former president put valuable campaign dollars into his courtroom fights. https://www.politico.com/news/2024/03/20/trump-leadership-pac-legal-bills-00148184
 

Biden is using the ‘are you better off today’ question to contrast himself with Trump

The Democratic president reminded the audience that the coronavirus had reached America, hospital emergency rooms were overcrowded, first responders were risking their lives to care for the sick and some nurses wore trash bags due to the scarcity of personal protective equipment.

"Morgues were being set up outside of hospitals because so many people were dying, unemployment shot up, the stock market crashed and grocery store shelves were bare," Biden said.

"And we were even in a toilet paper crisis,” he added, before he began to describe a turnaround after Trump.

“Donald Trump is no longer president, that’s the first thing,” Biden said, adding that COVID is under control, 15 million jobs returned and the stock market rebounded. https://apnews.com/article/biden-trump-bloodbath-better-off-f569346d886a2b4725b2f90d243d303d
 

THE DAILY GRILL …

“It couldn’t be a more important moment to have a voice like Ronna’s on the team would provide “an insider’s perspective on national politics and the future of the Republican Party.  Ms. McDaniel will be especially involved in the coverage of the 2024 campaign, including election nights.” — Memo from Carrie Budoff Brown, who oversees NBC News political coverage on the hiring of the former RNC Chair. https://www.nytimes.com/2024/03/22/business/media/ronna-mcdaniel-nbc-msnbc.html

VERSUS

“There’s a reason why there are a lot of journalists at NBC News uncomfortable with this because many of our professional dealings with the RNC over the last six years have been met with gaslighting, have been met with character assassination." —  Former "Meet the Press" host Chuck Todd after the network hired Ronna McDaniel as a political analyst. https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2024/03/24/chuck-todd-criticizes-nbc-ronna-mcdaniel/73085835007/
 

"The world is a very dangerous place. To those who advocate for abandoning Ukraine and letting Putin have his way, even more chaos will be released if your advice is followed. For the most part, these same people advocated for withdrawing from Afghanistan, Iraq, and Syria." — Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-SC).
https://twitter.com/AdamKinzinger/status/1772426599838683383

VERSUS

Senator Graham voted against the bipartisan bill sending aid to Ukraine.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2024/02/14/lindsey-graham-ukraine-trump/, https://thehill.com/homenews/senate/4476241-grahams-u-turns-have-senate-colleagues-fed-up-annoying-tiresome/



Donald Trump is celebrating Easter by selling copies of his latest product, the God Bless the USA Bible. Says Trump in his pitch: “And this is very important and very important to me. I want to have a lot of people have it. You have to have it for your heart, for your soul. We’ve lost religion in our country. All Americans need a Bible in their home and I have many, it’s my favorite book, it’s a lot of people’s favorite book. This Bible is a reminder that the biggest thing we have to bring back America and to make America great again is our religion. Religion is so important, it’s so missing.” https://truthsocial.com/@realDonaldTrump/posts/112162741690113521

VERSUS

“How could anyone believe former president Donald Trump's claim that he, of all people, was chosen by God to lead America? It's a logical question to ask of a man whose voluminous and multi-faceted criminal behavior is hard to keep up with. Many criminals specialize: think of white-collar criminals dedicated to insider trading or Ponzi schemes. Not Trump. His charges, indictments, convictions, and settlements for fraud, serial sexual assault and rape, election interference, retention of national defense information, falsifying business records, inciting insurrection and more span the personal, business, and political realms.” — Ruth Ben-Ghiat https://lucid.substack.com/p/trumps-holiness-rises-as-his-corruption